The Rites of Passages

Well, I suppose it all started out like everyone else's childhood, only mine was spent in France. Paris, actually. It is only the city known for romance and fine wine. And so just like everyone else I have talked with over the course of my life, we grew up and went to school, only, of course, my life was spent in France. Did you know the French invented the garlic press?

Academia came easy to me. School was nothing but a drudgery, like most kids experience, only mine was a French drudgery. And it came easy to me. I made straight A's. Straight French A's. In Paris. I'm pretty sure the French invented the letter A.

I fell in love when I was 15, only to a French boy. His name was Jean. Not John. Jean. We would take long walks around the Seine and visit the Notre Dame. We would hold hands as we ate bagettes on the cobblestone streets of Paris. We would drink French coffee and smoke French cigarrettes. Ah, we were in love. French love. Did you know that France is the number 1 exporter of diapers in the whole world?

Jean and I broke up 2 weeks later. And University was next for my life, only I didn't study abroad as so many of my French classmates had done. No, I stayed in France to study. I studied French. So many people thought it was so funny that here I was a French girl in France studying French. But I didn't think it was so strange. I thought it was quite natural. Afterall, the French invented French.

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